OBI WAN
03-20-05, 09:24 AM
Hot Lunch - While receiving head from a woman, you proceed to **** on her chest (AKA the Cleveland Steamer). This woman then becomes the "lunch lady".
The Stranger - Sitting on your hand until it falls asleep and then jerking off, it is eliciting the feeling of a hand job from someone else.
Airtight - A woman is said to be airtight when her anus, vagina, and mouth are all full of penis.
Balloon Ride – When eating her snatch you press you face tightly to it and blow large amounts of air inside. Just see how fast she floats off the bed.
Western Grip - When jerking off, turn your hand around, so that your thumb is facing towards you it is the same grip that rodeo folks use hence, western
The Blumpkin - Getting a blowjob while on the toilet.
Coyote - This occurs when you wake up in the room of a nasty wombat and you know you've got to give her the slip. However, you realize that your arm is wrapped around her. Therefore you must gnaw off your own arm to get out of the situation. Can be very painful.
Donkey Punch - While enjoying a woman doggy style, moments before you cum, sticking your penis in her ass, and then punching her in the back of the head. This gives a tremendous sensation, but for it to work correctly, the girl must be knocked out so that her ******* tightens up. Variations include kidney punches.
Frothy Walrus - As a man climaxes during a blowjob, he makes a joke, causing the blower to laugh, thus expelling the semen out his or her nose.
Strawberry Shortcake - After a man ejaculates on his partners face, he punches them in the nose. The blood and semen mix to for a pinkish red-and-white streaked mess, looking much like strawberry shortcake.
Tony Danza - Variant of the donkey punch. Includes the male asking the female, "Who's the boss?" Before she can answer, she is punched in the back of the head, whereupon the man says, "Tony ****in' Danza."
Golden Shower - Any form of pissing all over another person (AKA - water sports).
Pearl Necklace - Well known. Whenever a man cums on the neck/cleavage area of a person - it takes on the look of beautiful jewelry.
Purple Mushroom - This occurs when a woman is giving you a blow job and you withdraw your penis in order to poke it back into her cheek. It should leave a lasting impression similar to purple mushroom.
Fishhook - When having sex from behind, hook your fingers into her mouth and pull back, bearing the teeth.
The Ram - Again, you're attacking from behind, when you start ramming her head against the wall in a rhythmic motion. The force of the wall should allow for deeper penetration. Very handy for those lulls in penile sensitivity.
Bismarck - This is another one involving oral sex. Right before you are about to cum, you pull out, shooting your load all over your lover's face, aiming for an eye. You then punch the soiled eye.
Jelly Doughnut - A derivation of the Bismarck. All you have to do is punch her in the nose while you are getting head.
Pink glove - This frequently happens during sex when a girl is not wet enough. The inside of her twat sticks to your hog when you pull out. Thus, the pink glove.
The Fountain of You - While sitting on her face and having her eat your ass, jerk off like a madman. Build up as much pressure as possible before releasing, spewing like a venerable geyser all over her face, neck and tits. (Better to it in her bed).
The Fish Eye - From behind, you shove your finger in her ass (or his if you are in prison). Thereupon she turns around in a one-eyed winking motion to see what the hell you are doing.
Tuna Melt - You're down on a chick lapping away and discover that it just happens to be the time of the month. By no means do you stop though. When the whale spews, tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry smothers your face.
Fur Ball - You're chomping away at some mighty trollop who has a mane between her legs the size of Lionel Richie's Afro, when a mammoth fur ball gets lodged in your throat and causes you to beat the piss out of her.
The Woody Woodpecker - When she is sucking on your balls, tap the head of your **** on her forehead.
Dogs in a Tub - This is a proper name for when you attempt to insert your nuts into her ass. It is so named because it can be just as hard as keeping a dog in the tub while giving it a bath.
Gaylord Perry - Going to only one knuckle during an anal probe is for wimps. Make this famous knuckle ball pitcher proud and use multiple knuckles on that virgin corn hole. A minimum of two knuckles required (either on one finger or on multiple).
Rear Admiral - An absolute blast. When getting a chic from behind (while both partners standing), make sure you don't let her grab on to anything when she is bent over. Then, drive your hips into her backside so that you end up pushing her forward. The goal is to push her into a wall or table. It's almost as much fun to have her trip on her face on the floor. You become an Admiral when you can push her around the room without crashing into anything and not using your hands to grab onto her hips.
Tossing Salad - Another prison act where one person is forced to basically chow ******* with the help of whatever condiments are available, such as Jell-O®, olive oil, etc. Popularized by comedian Chris Rock.
The Bucking Bronco- An all time classic. You start by having sex from behind, and then just when your partner is really enjoying it, you grab onto them somehow as tightly as possible and call out another person's name, usually an ex. Then hold on as long as you can as they try to buck you off.
Snowjob - Blowjob involving ice cubes.
Snowmobile - Always a blast. When getting a girl while she's on all fours, sweep out her arms so she falls on her face.
The Dirty Sanchez - A time honored event in which, while doing your partner from behind, you insert your finger into said person's *******, pull it out, wipe it across their upper lip leaving a thin, **** moustache. This makes them look like someone whose name would be Dirty Sanchez. Frat house variants include sneaking up on an unsuspecting frat brother after soiling your own finger, placing it below their nose, and yelling, "Dirty Sanchez!"
Zebra - When two black people enjoy one white person.
The Chilidog - You take a poo on a girl's breasts and then place your penis between her breasts. Also accomplished after anal sex without the pooing.
Glass Bottom Boat - Putting saran wrap over your partners face and laying a hot **** there. Particularly popular in Japan. (AKA- known as Fudge Topping)
Ray-Bans - Put your testicles over your partner's eye sockets while getting head. (Picture it: Your ass on her forehead.)
Chaugle - To **** in your woman’s drawers. In usage, "I gave her Chaugle Pants".
Chicken - A woman, while riding a man's ****, chokes him until he's unconscious.
Felching - After a man ejaculates into her anus, he sucks it out through a straw. (Popular in Los Angeles)
Crossed Swords - A blowjob involving two penises at one time. Three becomes a Jawbreaker.
New Jersey Meat Hook - When a man is having sex with a woman from behind, he then places a finger in her anus to pull her up and down on his penis.
Perfect Ten - The maximum number of men a woman can pleasure at one time. So called because of the math involved: one each in the mouth, anus, and vagina, one in each hand, one in the crook of each elbow, one in the bend of each knee and one between the feet.
Shanghai Surprise - When you find out your lover is not the sex you thought they were. You've just been given the Shanghai Surprise.
Dutch Oven - Rather simple. Whenever you pass gas while in bed, pull the covers over both of your head so your partner can enjoy your pork and beans as well.
The Compressor – While having sex from behind you remove your penis quickly and reinsert it quickly. Repeat this about 5 to 8 times. Then pull out quickly and rock her back and forth a few times or squeeze her abdomen tightly. It will emit sounds that will embarrass her. (AKA – The Queiff)
The Stranger - Sitting on your hand until it falls asleep and then jerking off, it is eliciting the feeling of a hand job from someone else.
Airtight - A woman is said to be airtight when her anus, vagina, and mouth are all full of penis.
Balloon Ride – When eating her snatch you press you face tightly to it and blow large amounts of air inside. Just see how fast she floats off the bed.
Western Grip - When jerking off, turn your hand around, so that your thumb is facing towards you it is the same grip that rodeo folks use hence, western
The Blumpkin - Getting a blowjob while on the toilet.
Coyote - This occurs when you wake up in the room of a nasty wombat and you know you've got to give her the slip. However, you realize that your arm is wrapped around her. Therefore you must gnaw off your own arm to get out of the situation. Can be very painful.
Donkey Punch - While enjoying a woman doggy style, moments before you cum, sticking your penis in her ass, and then punching her in the back of the head. This gives a tremendous sensation, but for it to work correctly, the girl must be knocked out so that her ******* tightens up. Variations include kidney punches.
Frothy Walrus - As a man climaxes during a blowjob, he makes a joke, causing the blower to laugh, thus expelling the semen out his or her nose.
Strawberry Shortcake - After a man ejaculates on his partners face, he punches them in the nose. The blood and semen mix to for a pinkish red-and-white streaked mess, looking much like strawberry shortcake.
Tony Danza - Variant of the donkey punch. Includes the male asking the female, "Who's the boss?" Before she can answer, she is punched in the back of the head, whereupon the man says, "Tony ****in' Danza."
Golden Shower - Any form of pissing all over another person (AKA - water sports).
Pearl Necklace - Well known. Whenever a man cums on the neck/cleavage area of a person - it takes on the look of beautiful jewelry.
Purple Mushroom - This occurs when a woman is giving you a blow job and you withdraw your penis in order to poke it back into her cheek. It should leave a lasting impression similar to purple mushroom.
Fishhook - When having sex from behind, hook your fingers into her mouth and pull back, bearing the teeth.
The Ram - Again, you're attacking from behind, when you start ramming her head against the wall in a rhythmic motion. The force of the wall should allow for deeper penetration. Very handy for those lulls in penile sensitivity.
Bismarck - This is another one involving oral sex. Right before you are about to cum, you pull out, shooting your load all over your lover's face, aiming for an eye. You then punch the soiled eye.
Jelly Doughnut - A derivation of the Bismarck. All you have to do is punch her in the nose while you are getting head.
Pink glove - This frequently happens during sex when a girl is not wet enough. The inside of her twat sticks to your hog when you pull out. Thus, the pink glove.
The Fountain of You - While sitting on her face and having her eat your ass, jerk off like a madman. Build up as much pressure as possible before releasing, spewing like a venerable geyser all over her face, neck and tits. (Better to it in her bed).
The Fish Eye - From behind, you shove your finger in her ass (or his if you are in prison). Thereupon she turns around in a one-eyed winking motion to see what the hell you are doing.
Tuna Melt - You're down on a chick lapping away and discover that it just happens to be the time of the month. By no means do you stop though. When the whale spews, tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry smothers your face.
Fur Ball - You're chomping away at some mighty trollop who has a mane between her legs the size of Lionel Richie's Afro, when a mammoth fur ball gets lodged in your throat and causes you to beat the piss out of her.
The Woody Woodpecker - When she is sucking on your balls, tap the head of your **** on her forehead.
Dogs in a Tub - This is a proper name for when you attempt to insert your nuts into her ass. It is so named because it can be just as hard as keeping a dog in the tub while giving it a bath.
Gaylord Perry - Going to only one knuckle during an anal probe is for wimps. Make this famous knuckle ball pitcher proud and use multiple knuckles on that virgin corn hole. A minimum of two knuckles required (either on one finger or on multiple).
Rear Admiral - An absolute blast. When getting a chic from behind (while both partners standing), make sure you don't let her grab on to anything when she is bent over. Then, drive your hips into her backside so that you end up pushing her forward. The goal is to push her into a wall or table. It's almost as much fun to have her trip on her face on the floor. You become an Admiral when you can push her around the room without crashing into anything and not using your hands to grab onto her hips.
Tossing Salad - Another prison act where one person is forced to basically chow ******* with the help of whatever condiments are available, such as Jell-O®, olive oil, etc. Popularized by comedian Chris Rock.
The Bucking Bronco- An all time classic. You start by having sex from behind, and then just when your partner is really enjoying it, you grab onto them somehow as tightly as possible and call out another person's name, usually an ex. Then hold on as long as you can as they try to buck you off.
Snowjob - Blowjob involving ice cubes.
Snowmobile - Always a blast. When getting a girl while she's on all fours, sweep out her arms so she falls on her face.
The Dirty Sanchez - A time honored event in which, while doing your partner from behind, you insert your finger into said person's *******, pull it out, wipe it across their upper lip leaving a thin, **** moustache. This makes them look like someone whose name would be Dirty Sanchez. Frat house variants include sneaking up on an unsuspecting frat brother after soiling your own finger, placing it below their nose, and yelling, "Dirty Sanchez!"
Zebra - When two black people enjoy one white person.
The Chilidog - You take a poo on a girl's breasts and then place your penis between her breasts. Also accomplished after anal sex without the pooing.
Glass Bottom Boat - Putting saran wrap over your partners face and laying a hot **** there. Particularly popular in Japan. (AKA- known as Fudge Topping)
Ray-Bans - Put your testicles over your partner's eye sockets while getting head. (Picture it: Your ass on her forehead.)
Chaugle - To **** in your woman’s drawers. In usage, "I gave her Chaugle Pants".
Chicken - A woman, while riding a man's ****, chokes him until he's unconscious.
Felching - After a man ejaculates into her anus, he sucks it out through a straw. (Popular in Los Angeles)
Crossed Swords - A blowjob involving two penises at one time. Three becomes a Jawbreaker.
New Jersey Meat Hook - When a man is having sex with a woman from behind, he then places a finger in her anus to pull her up and down on his penis.
Perfect Ten - The maximum number of men a woman can pleasure at one time. So called because of the math involved: one each in the mouth, anus, and vagina, one in each hand, one in the crook of each elbow, one in the bend of each knee and one between the feet.
Shanghai Surprise - When you find out your lover is not the sex you thought they were. You've just been given the Shanghai Surprise.
Dutch Oven - Rather simple. Whenever you pass gas while in bed, pull the covers over both of your head so your partner can enjoy your pork and beans as well.
The Compressor – While having sex from behind you remove your penis quickly and reinsert it quickly. Repeat this about 5 to 8 times. Then pull out quickly and rock her back and forth a few times or squeeze her abdomen tightly. It will emit sounds that will embarrass her. (AKA – The Queiff)